The most wonderful time of the year

It’s almost time to put on your stretchiest bottoms and eat more than you will all year. To sing loudly and proudly, argue with your family over a board game and most importantly spend time with your loved ones.  But as wonderful as the festive time is for many, it can be a challenging time…

a fragment of light. 

Fuck. Well 10 months, it was a good run. Back on 22nd September I posted about noticing that I was in the eye of the storm… well it was strong and no matter the preparation and the efforts to prevent it hitting land. It has, a 6/10 on the bipolar II scale. Last week I…

Two years of grief.

If you are to understand anything from this post, understand that grief is simply yet painfully: the loss of love.

knocked for six…

I’ve been feeling fine. Yeah I know actually fine. Who knew such a word could actually contain sentiment but believe it, it can.  For the past month I’ve been busying myself with friends 30th birthday parties, trips to middle earth, baby showers and the like and it’s been lovely. Yet feeling fine has knocked me…

the eye of the storm

It always amazes me how fast I can go from 60mph to 0mph. The signs are always there, telling me that a storm is coming… And I see them and I dance with them hoping for some sun instead but no the rain will always come. As much as I’ve spoken about what it’s like…

a rationalising thought…

I’ve spent many a year sat in therapy trying to understand my own mind, which is difficult for anyone but even more so when your rapid cycling episodes change on a bi-weekly basis. Why would I put myself through it? Sitting opposite a relative stranger discussing my deepest and darkest thoughts? Well imagine if you…

Goldilocks and the sandwich board…

There’s something in all of us that likes to be needed, to be wanted and adored. Whether that’s the short term kicks of a Tinder match or a pat on the back from your boss, or it’s the long term need to procreate or get promoted and win a shiny gold star. We all like…

putting it together

seasons of april mental health blog this episode discusses how to deal with a period of wellness and her anxiety around it.

something far greater than I

I can’t breathe today. For no reason other than my lungs seem to be hitting my ribs harder than normal, bruising them with every breath. And I can’t get the putrid nausea out of my mouth, burning my throat with every swallow. Depression is a real bastard. You start to see some light through the blackness…